Yogi Me

So I thought I would take a minute to write about my yoga experiences because I find them very interesting. I have always wanted to "do yoga," but in the back of my head I always thought "whatever that means." My experience with the exercise or relaxation technique or contortionist class, whatever you like to call it, was the sum of reading magazine articles about Jennifer Aniston and Madonna "doing yoga" and watching pretty actresses in romantic comedies "do yoga." From what I could assert, it looked fairly simplistic. Apparently you have to be able to balance, focus and you don't even have to wear tennis shoes. Ordinarily I would think that an activity like this would be too good to be true as a means for achieving fitness; however, Madonna and Aniston are pretty hot, if I do say so myself. And while I would not necessarily take Madonna's word for it, who can't help but believe Rachel Green? I figured that since there are very few activities for knocked up gals to partake in, why not try yoga. Running and walking were clearly not going to be enough activity to really stimulate me; unless of course somebody began chasing me. Then again with the bobcats and coyotes that frequent my neighborhood like patrolling hookers being chased could become a real sport for me.

So I attend my first couple prenatal yoga classes. I learn the basics. Yoga requires gear. You need a mat, a strap (not like a gun), blocks (without the alphabet written across them), a bolster (nothing cheeky to add about that) and a Mexican style blanket. I don't know if we use Mexican style blankets because we are here in Tucson or if that is the norm. Perhaps in Connecticut they use Martha Stewart style quilts. In any event, the classes were enjoyable, non challenging and interesting to say the least.

Last night I went to a normal yoga class. My prenatal instructor said this class would be fine. From the minute I walked in, I knew this class would be different, the real deal. There was some warm, sensual Eastern scent permeating throughout the room. The room was dark, partly from the sparse lighting and partly due to it being evening. As I sat on my blanket, to help steady my sacrum ( whatever that is), I was overwhelmed by my mind racing. It was calm tranquility all around me but utter chaos on the inside. I try to listen to the instructor describing how to make belly breaths that gradually come up my rib cage and hold in my throat, but in my mind I am reliving the Real Housewives of Beverly Hills reunion. How could Cedric have done that to Lisa? And exhale. Then the little voice in my head that is a perfectionist starts whining about how I am not doing it right, and I really should quit watching so much reality television. Funny, I didn't hear from her during the airing of the reunion special, and I am quite certain she won't pipe up while watching Top Chef later.

The instructor then says that while you are finding your center you may have thoughts enter and exit your mind. Mine must have been illuminated on my forehead in HD. She then said to simply let them come, acknowledge them and then move on. Worth a shot. I pictured my brain being like the Panama Canal. I would just let the thoughts pass like ships. My mind was quieted and I began to get what it was all about. The stretches and poses, though challenging for the body were equally challenging for the mind. There is this one pose called "the tree" where you must firmly plant (no pun intended) one leg into the ground while hoisting your other foot onto your thigh creating a triangle of sorts. You have to focus on one thing and really quiet your mind in order to keep from losing your balance. I learned quickly after I saw one lady stumble and thought, "well, at least the pregnant lady wasn't the first to go down;" of course after which I promptly lost my footing. Thats when I really liked Yoga. You can't compete at it. You can't out yoga someone. You are just stuck with yourself.

I left that night in the chilly night wind, 32 degrees according to my car, feeling very at peace with the world. The cold felt good. The drive felt good. It was as if all of the day to day insanity that accumulates in my mind had had a great glass of wine. Everything was calm and serene. I don't know if by "doing yoga" I will ever have abs or arms that can revival those of a celebrity, but quite frankly I don't mind that at all. I just like the calm. I like enjoying an activity that brings me some tranquility. I like yogi me.